feel a little bit sour and sad today!

today i went to my college..i miss my 1st class coz i go to my best friends house and we talk bout stories when we are at 15-17...its so happy..long time i din so happy b4 already..till 3am in the morning then i go home...the class is about 10am in the morning...i cant wake up and the weather is rainy make me wanna sleep more...and i have a nice dream last night..bout wad dream..shhhh..secret hahas....i skip a sem in my college and when i come back i find lots of things change...i belive im a friendly guy...to everyone...i like to make jokes...i like to see my friends happy...but maybe i make them frustrated sometimes...i got a very very lovely friend in my college..is a lady..shes quite cute...and lovely...for me shes totally perfect...she take care of other ppl feeling and she make me really did like i wanna take her like my sis...i can swear that if anything she need help i would never reject...coz she help me quite a lot when last sem...shes my best buddy...sometimes she is not willing to do the things i want her to do...but she stil make it at last..i seldom saw a girl like her...but now...in the new semester...seems smth goes wrong...i think she a little bit angry with me...and she seems walking away from me anyway...i like to say her stupid..last time she wont angry at all and she also will say herself :"ya im stupid"...i like to play around with her when talk with her i feel happy...and now...she change or i change i dono...but i feel hurt when she not very good with me like last time that we are...maybe she got more friends already...i thot between the relationship i with her...we can always play around and wont angry with each other...i ever ask her...:"why i force you do smth or jus insult you,and you wont get angry with me at all?" she said:"why do i have to get angry?"that word makes me feel warm...i really don wish to lost my best buddys...i wish her come back like the way last time...it feels hurt when she treat me bad anyway...i don know wad can i say to her...should i say straight to her...or she wan a apologize for i too bullying her?if i really apologize thats means she just a normal friends to me anymore...but another best friend of mine is still very nice with me...and for the one i ever love..i just dono how to start a conversation...maybe i really jus escaping smth from myself....and for my best buddys in college..like my love one say maybe she got bf...but as long as i know her...shes not the girl like dat...i believe in myself...lost a lover lost a best friend...wad i have to lost next?tell me?lord of god...don play with me...is it hard to find a best friend...